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“Sista…You are strong!”

Tammy on her 30th birthday in December with co-workers

Tammy on her 30th birthday in December with co-workers

I went out on a date with a cool guy with a really good vibe, but he just was not for me. This was in October 2014. He told me that he wanted lots of kids. I told him that I did not want any kids. He asked me why.

My reply: I want to be Dr. Tammy Rhodes. I want to own myself. I want to own a cute boutique. Write plays. Star in plays. Sing. Write songs. Go on a tour of peace. Become an activist in every sense of the word. Touch hearts. Make every child my child. And be in love with one person selfishly without having to be responsible for anything or anyone.

His reply: Oh, so you’re one of those women?

This really upset me. It downright pissed me off. I immediately shot back with a smart ass reply. I figured he insinuated that I was an angry, single, black woman and immediately became defensive. I expressed that to him.

He replied: No, Ms. Tammy. None of those. You’re strong. And it is beautiful. You are yourself and you are strong enough to be you.

He taught me a lesson. I never saw myself as strong because I knew what I wanted. Just weird. Just Tammy. But he taught me a lesson. Anytime a woman/man/person is smart enough to know what he/she wants and who he/she wants to be, he/she is strong. And that is beautiful!


Tammy Rhodes was born in Florence and raised in Muscle Shoals. “The Shoals is my home and I love it here.” She is an Administrative Assistant at the University of North Alabama, and is a minister, singer, director, actress, and poet. “I work in one of the most diverse offices on the campus of UNA. I am a proud dog mommy to my true loves, Shug and Doozy! I’ve been known to hum a little bit and to spit some spoken word every now and again. But mainly I am a thriving spirit trying every day to leave a positive imprint on the world.”

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